heleanor | 【ＲＰ】ＯｐｅｎＰｏｓｔ

Tsukki is my friend!

[He definitely looks offended at the direction Oikawa's questions are taking.]

Why do you seem to have a hard time believing that, Oikawa-san?

[Oikawa notices Yamaguchi's offence but he figures Yamaguchi should probably lose any hope of thinking Oikawa's nice and not taking heed of overstepping his bounds will help that.]

Because you don't see how good you are and he hasn't told you. [Oikawa shrugs, tries to let go of some of the tension he's built up.] I think you like him more than he likes you.

[Yamaguchi looks like he might actually snap at him for that—then, he deflates a bit instead, and sits back with a slumped posture in his chair. He avoids looking at Oikawa again, staring down at the spoon in his hand as he twirls it distractedly. Yamaguchi's eyes are downcast and narrowed, but not quite angry, either. Only thinking.]

...Tsukki is my friend. [There's no doubt in his voice of that, none at all. ] If he didn't like me, he wouldn't let me hang around him the way he does, I don't think...

[That phrasing makes their friendship sound a lot worse and more one-sided than it actually is. Not that Yamaguchi notices, used to talking about himself that way. He's still a bit lost in thought: thinking of the ways that Tsukishima treats him differently than other people, which are hard to explain to an outsider. But he notices.

Tsukishima does tell Yamaguchi to shut up plenty. And he's not spared from the other's sharp tongue, when he deserves it. But Tsukishima does go out of his way to spend time with Yamaguchi, and includes him on his jokes. He lets Yamaguchi hang off him more than is probably appropriate, and never speaks disparagingly of him the way he would people like Kageyama and Hinata.

Tsukishima makes Yamaguchi's life better.] It's true that I like Tsukki a lot...probably more than he likes me.

But he has told me I'm cool. [He finally looks up at Oikawa, forcing himself not to break eye contact.] I'm glad, that he's my best friend.

[Oikawa's breath hitches as Yamaguchi says that last bit. God damn it. He breaks eye contact, since it doesn't seem like Yamaguchi will, and drags his hand down his face.]

Well, he's right about you being cool, at least.

[He doesn't get it. Yamaguchi sounds completely certain of himself. Happy to have a best friend who Oikawa's seen no evidence of caring about him. He probably shouldn't talk, his best friend isn't exactly affectionate, but no one would mistake Iwaizumi's yelling for not caring about Oikawa.

And he can't imagine Yamaguchi being happy with the way Tsukishima treats him. Not when he seemed so flattered by Oikawa's attention, but there's no way he's lying.]

[This time, it's Yamaguchi's turn to inhale sharply—any anger or resentment is driven from his mind and he goes the slightest bit pink, again, giving Oikawa a strange look that's half-stunned and half something else.]

You...You really think I'm cool?? [IT DIDN'T CROSS HIS MIND TOO HEAVILY WHEN HE WAS THINKING ABOUT IT EARLIER BUT YEAH, YAMAGUCHI IS STILL NOT PREPARED TO HEAR THAT FROM ANYONE, EVER]

[Yamaguchi, stop being cute or he's going to fall for you and then your real problems start. Just ask Iwaizumi.]

Of course. I don't say things like that unless they're true. [Oikawa's lips quirk into a small smile, he's not quite ready to go back to his entirely fake ones just yet but it's kind of nice that Yamaguchi is looking happier again.] Would you like to know why?

...!? Umm... [The honest part of Yamaguchi is desperately curious, as a matter of fact. But he still burns unpleasantly at the memory of Oikawa accusing him of fishing for compliments.]

...Well...that's...

["Well... that's..." a good enough answer for Oikawa.

He starts playing with the straw of his milkshake again to keep his hands busy as he starts listing things. This is going to be a little embarrassing to say but he'll be less embarrassed than Yamaguchi.]

You're humble - you would never think you're capable of more than you are which makes you an excellent team player. I don't know what they've done to deserve it but you're loyal to your friend and your team. You'd never do anything against any of them if you could help it. And I can trust you as well, which is important when we're opponents. I don't think you'd ever hesitate when playing me.

You work hard, even when you don't know if it will pay off and you don't get discouraged easily.

If you get a chance, you make jokes. You're smart and quick on the uptake. You make me laugh all the time and actually mean it - not many people can do that on purpose, Yama-chan.

And you're cute. [He finishes, picking up his drink and sipping at it.]

[Yamaguchi...doesn't know how to react, let alone respond, as Oikawa starts talking—and Yamaguchi realizes he's talking seriously.]

Edited (forgot a word oops) 2015-02-08 07:00 (UTC)

[He's outlining things about Yamaguchi, real-sounding things, like he's actually noticed and been paying attention to him these past few weeks while Yamaguchi was texting him. Like he actually enjoyed doing so. Like Oikawa actually thought these things to himself enough to actually have something waiting to say, when the time presented itself and–]

[–and Yamaguchi can't even wrap his mind around the concept of that, even though Oikawa's still talking and Yamaguchi's suddenly breathing much too fast and looking anywhere but to the other side of the table because—because it's just, too much to believe, no way. And unreal, just really absurd to imagine, the notion of anyone having those kinda of thoughts about Yamaguchi of all people who spends all his time hovering in Tsukishima's shadow.

Let alone for words like that to be floating around in the brain of someone as smart, and dedicated, and talented and cool as Oikawa is, and–]

[–and it really

kind of...]

[...makes him second-guess, if Tsukishima really is the only guy Yamaguchi isn't sure anymore how he feels about.

which

damn it

...means he's going to be hunched over, and burying his face in his hands for the foreseeable future, while sunk down as low as humanly possible in his café chair. Sorry, Oikawa; you kind of broke him]

[He expected something like this, so Yamaguchi attempting a disappearing act in his chair doesn't worry him that much.

He watches him for a moment. Kind of wants to reach across the table to touch him but that would be overstepping far more than anything he's said has. And he's more comfortable using words than anything else.]

It's okay if you don't like me, Yama-chan. But I do want you to like yourself.

[He shouldn't say that, really. He can't control people liking themselves. But he does honestly like Yamaguchi. He likes him far, far more than he thought he would. And he's starting to feel like he should back away because of that.]

I have plenty more to say, if you want to hear it?

[He does, but he also doesn't want Yamaguchi to literally die. As it is he can still see him breathing so the odds are good his heart hasn't exploded or anything like that.]

... ...

[Yamaguchi has to take a deep, shuddering breath, rubbing his palms over his eyelids and blinking back something suspiciously close to tears before he can bring himself to lower his hands away. Even then, reestablishing eye contact is beyond him.]

...S-Sorry!! ...I'm...not sure what to say after that...Oikawa-san...

Thank you, I mean...you really didn't have to...c-call me all those great things...

[He still looks beyond flustered, but this time it's not unhappy. In fact, he might even be smiling just the slightest bit, though it's hard to tell with Yamaguchi looking in every direction but Oikawa's.]

[Oikawa makes himself press back against his chair and forces himself to be relaxed as he shrugs because he thinks (maybe) Yamaguchi's smiling again and his stomach calms down from twisting itself into a knot - he hadn't even realised it was until he noticed the difference.]

But I wanted to, Yama-chan. And that really is only the start of what I like about you.

[One thing that's nice about Yamaguchi avoiding looking at him is he can look at Yamaguchi as much as he likes. Which is a lot.]

[Yamaguchi can't even form words to respond to that. His head's reeling. Only the start? How could that possibly true? He's already listed out more good things to say about Yamaguchi than could possibly be true...

Yamaguchi's shoulders tremble a bit, from the effort of keeping himself contained, and he hasn't got the faintest clue why he's suddenly having to fight the urge to cry like a ten-year-old. And all over something as idiotic as a really cool person being...nice to him. Would Oikawa still say that stuff if he could see how much Yamaguchi's struggling internally to even respond to it?]

Y...You're really amazing...Oikawa-san...! [It's not exactly the word he's looking for, but Yamaguchi's sort of at a loss for how to actually describe what Oikawa's making him feel. Speaking has never been Yamaguchi's strong suit, unfortunately.]

[Oikawa smiles, almost sadly, without realising it. Because Yamaguchi's words make his heart skip a beat, except...]

Yama-chan. Don't go saying things that aren't true.

[He can't imagine that Yamaguchi isn't just trying to give him a compliment in return. That's one thing with doling out praises, he can keep his own thoughts straight by assuming that other people are being nice when they say something kind back. Because he's nothing like amazing. He's average at best and mean and irritating at worst. He's just lucky enough that some people stick around him even through that.]

Wha??

How come you think it's not, Oikawa-san!? [Still blushing, but now he looks upset and he's actually making eye contact. Because he isn't lying, and he doesn't understand why Oikawa of all people is either implying that Yamaguchi is, or worse, implying that Oikawa himself is anything less than amazing.

Yamaguchi may not like to admit it about a rival in volleyball, but Oikawa is unquestionably one of the coolest and most amazing people he's ever met. And that's only after having half a dessert with him. ~~Yamaguchi does not have discerning taste.~~]

I'm hardly amazing. [And he's feeling a little awkward pointing it out. It's obvious, and he would have thought Yamaguchi would have been able to see through his ridiculousness by now. He's not nice and he's not amazing either.

He dissects himself just as much as he does other people and as far as he's concerned he comes up lacking in every way. He works hard to change his flaws, but there are too may that he can't budge. Ironically, chronic self-depreciation is one of those and he can only mask it so much by pretending he's the best.

He probably shouldn't have said anything. If Yamaguchi's only still here because he's buying into Oikawa's act then he should have let him. Whether Yamaguchi likes Oikawa himself or not, Oikawa likes him and would miss him if he doesn't like Oikawa enough to stick around.]

...? That...doesn't make any sense, Oikawa-san! Of course you are!! [Oikawa's funny, charming, cool, smart...not to mention incredible at volleyball.

And he's. Maybe. Kind of...attractive? Ohhhh boy he may really be in over his head here, crap, crap crap crap.]

[Oikawa busies himself with what remains of his bread. He's almost uncomfortable enough to say to hell with it and start dipping it in his milkshake but not quite.]

Yama-chan, please don't. [He can't articulate exactly what he wants Yamaguchi to stop doing but he definitely wants him to stop with something.]

[Oikawa doesn't exactly say "Shut up," but Yamaguchi hears it anyway. He snaps his mouth shut immediately, with a churning shame settling in the pit of his stomach, and ducks his head to avoid looking at Oikawa again.]

S-Sorry. Sorry. [Yamaguchi doesn't know what he's apologizing for, really, but he senses he's done something to upset the setter and he doesn't want to press his luck.]

[Oikawa tries not to cringe.] You're doing fine, Yama-chan. [He's the asshole here.

He pushes his milkshake away, there's still a third or so left but the whole "sharing" idea hasn't exactly worked out.]

[Yamaguchi fidgets, letting the silence stew for an uncomfortable moment longer before he blurts out,]

Was it something I said?? [He doesn't understand why Oikawa would suddenly go cold over being praised, even with his personality taken into account. It wasn't like Yamaguchi was lying to him!]

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[1/5]

[2/5]

[3/5]

[4/5]

[5/5] I AM SO SORRY

WHY WOULD YOU EVER BE SORRY

HE IS SO RIDICULOUS

it's adorable. some day soon oikawa's going to compliment him too hard and he'll have an aneurysm

yamaguchi should tell him to start carrying around a defibrillator

There's no way he would. Iwaizumi would have to follow them with it.

the cutest most awkward triple dates in the history of volleyball

iwaizumi laughs every time yamaguchi says something nice about oikawa, it's adorable

these two have compatible self-esteem issues haha sob

they do, poor darlings.

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