Why is this so hard? He could swear he did better when he wasn't trying to be nice to Yamaguchi. But then if he goes back to the way he was acting before Yamaguchi will probably think he's done something even worse and just... crawl into a hole to die.]
Not at all, Yama-chan. It's only fairly terrible. And I'd rather have even a terrible date with you than do something else.
I'll try harder! …Next time, I won't mess anything up or…I mean, if you give me another chance!! [Yamaguchi cuts off, still in panic mode internally for thinking he may have said the wrong thing. Is there going to BE a next time? Is he overestimating Oikawa's patience again? He can't just assume things, even if he's still totally unsure how he even feels about a second…date?…with Oikawa. He can't let it go badly, no matter what. Who knows what might happen if he did. 'Fairly terrible' isn't a good standard to set, but Oikawa's expression makes it seem like he can, forgive that, possibly? Maybe?? Does that mean Yamaguchi owes him a favor?]
[Briefly, frantically, he considers taking Yamaguchi's phone and asking Tsukishima for advice on what the hell to do when Yamaguchi isn't listening.]
Yama-chan. I would go on a hundred fairly terrible dates with you without complaint. [Is that going to get through? He's not counting on it. But what else can he even say?]
[Probably better that he didn't, depending on Tsukishima's mood. He might just take one look at the text and simply decide to murder Oikawa at some point in the future, while making it look like an accident for Yamaguchi.]
Buh? [Yamaguchi shuts up, finally, struggling to process this.]
[Oikawa could take him, he's got Iwaizumi looking out for him. (That is, if he hadn't done anything recently to cause Iwaizumi to offer to hide the body instead.)]
Even if it's terrible, it's still with you. [He shrugs. He wants to add a compliment, or remind Yamaguchi that he said he likes him plenty of times now but... before, he knew Yamaguchi probably wouldn't believe him. Now the chance that he would seems higher.]
[He has hardly any bread left but be damned if he isn't going to distract himself with it to avoid doing more than shrugging in response to that.
He hates being sincere but when he does want to have another date - and the idea that they might not doesn't appeal at all - he can't put on a falsely cheerful and flirty act to cover how much he does mean what he's saying.]
[Of course Yamaguchi takes that impassive shrug, as an answer in the negative to his question.
Of course.]
Oh... [He's very clearly disappointed, the wide-eyed look going out of him to be replaced by something more familiar. He's not upset, not quite, since Oikawa still said he wanted to...to go on another date, so maybe he's feeling uncertain like Yamaguchi is? Yamaguchi can't blame him; after all, his own emotions are doing all sorts of uncalled-for things to him today.]
[Oikawa glances up because that response didn't sound... And no. Yamaguchi thinks - what? That he doesn't like him? How? They keep going in circles. Oikawa mentally gives himself a slap. Because he's gotten too close already. He takes a breath, sets the tiny mouthful that is the rest of his bread down and takes a step back in his mind to assess the situation.
The first thing he notes is his own discomfort, nothing new but important. Because he got so caught up in it that he forgot to pay attention to Yamaguchi properly. Yamaguchi who is insecure, Oikawa knows that. Of course he wouldn't take the right message from anything other than explicit words.]
I like you a lot. But you're probably too nice for me, Yama-chan. [That has his usual grain of truth in it. Going on a date with someone he likes is almost too much, if Yamaguchi ever confirmed that he likes Oikawa back - and not just when he's teasing and playing like he's a nice person - Oikawa will be hard pressed not to turn him down and claim that he was pretending the whole time.]
['Insecure' is probably an understatement. Yamaguchi gives Oikawa a confused look when he's finished speaking, clearly uncertain of how to make sense of that statement.]
Too nice? I don't get it. [Sure, he probably seems nice compared to Tsukishima, but honestly who isn't?]
[Why that makes Oikawa's stomach flip flop he doesn't know.]
Nice people get tired of me quickly. [Or they realise one day that the glimpses of a not very nice person they get from Oikawa occasionally are who Oikawa actually is.]
[Yamaguchi looks incredulous, like he simply can't believe that for one second. Oikawa's a cool person with a with a lot of fans and accomplishments, why does he think people will get bored of him like it's no big deal?]
Yes. Tired of me. [He's snapping, just a tiny bit. He spends so much time pretending that he's perfect that repeating something like that isn't exactly pleasant.]
[Not as cool as Tsukishima? He doesn't collect dinosaur toys, that's at least ten cool points over Tsukishima right there!!]
It's not something you should worry about, Yama-chan. You don't mind spending time with me now and I don't plan to waste the time I have. [It's going to take more than that to convince Oikawa that nice people don't get tired of him. And when Yamaguchi does, he just has to back away and it will be like it never happened.]
That's only because...I thought...you were trying to mess with me.
[And because he tried to start off the conversation by casually propositioning him, which Yamaguchi isn't going to mention now because he's still not certain whether or not that was fully intended as a joke.]
But, it's a different situation now, though, Oikawa-san! ...Right?
[Oikawa avoids eye contact. He likes Yamaguchi, and it's not like he'll be happy when Yamaguchi realises he's not a good person but he's not going to pretend it won't happen. Because he's completely convinced that it will.]
And who's to say the situation won't change again?
I'm letting you have an out, Yama-chan. The least you can do is remember I gave it to you when you change your mind.
If that's...what you really want... [He seems disappointed at the thought Oikawa would think so mistrustfully of him, but Yamaguchi doesn't want to argue the point. He just wants to make his feelings known, and Oikawa can believe them or not.]
...I'm probably not gonna change my mind, though. [Like Oikawa, Yamaguchi hasn't got many friends. Karasuno and the team are slowly changing that, but when it comes down to it there's still a lot Yamaguchi's willing to put up with to keep the ones he has—even Tsukishima has only crossed that line once, to date.]
[He can accept "probably". At least it means he'll keep the idea in mind that there might be a time where getting the hell away from Oikawa could be his best move.
He sighs, relaxes back in his chair.]
How much of this conversation do you think our waitress has listened to?
[He hasn't seen her listening in, and it would be unprofessional for her to, but if he was in her shoes he'd have listened to everything she could have.]
[That makes Yamaguchi panic and jump back half a meter from the setter's chair—he's so used to being ignored by now, that he hadn't even considered the possibility that anyone else might be eavesdropping. He frantically glances around, searching the surrounding restaurant for judging eyes of any waitstaff, other patrons, or custodians that might be listening in. Yamaguchi's gotten better, a lot better, about ignoring the unkind opinions of others when they crop up. But the idea of being subjected to that in front of Oikawa of all people is mortifying.]
I don't know. [He checks over Yamaguchi's shoulder, there really is no evidence of her eavesdropping at all.]
But if I saw two attractive guys out on a date I'd want to know what they were saying. [He is sometimes a nosy bastard, but does have past evidence of people listening in on his conversations with Iwaizumi, though that didn't have the "date" part.]
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Shit.
Why is this so hard? He could swear he did better when he wasn't trying to be nice to Yamaguchi. But then if he goes back to the way he was acting before Yamaguchi will probably think he's done something even worse and just... crawl into a hole to die.]
Not at all, Yama-chan. It's only fairly terrible. And I'd rather have even a terrible date with you than do something else.
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Yama-chan. I would go on a hundred fairly terrible dates with you without complaint. [Is that going to get through? He's not counting on it. But what else can he even say?]
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Buh? [Yamaguchi shuts up, finally, struggling to process this.]
You...would?? Even if it's terrible?
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Even if it's terrible, it's still with you. [He shrugs. He wants to add a compliment, or remind Yamaguchi that he said he likes him plenty of times now but... before, he knew Yamaguchi probably wouldn't believe him. Now the chance that he would seems higher.]
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Oikawa-san...y-you...really like me? [Enough to be worth the inconvenience? Enough to be more than an inconvenience? But, Yamaguchi...
...Yamaguchi didn't even have to do anything. It just happened.]
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He hates being sincere but when he does want to have another date - and the idea that they might not doesn't appeal at all - he can't put on a falsely cheerful and flirty act to cover how much he does mean what he's saying.]
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Of course.]
Oh... [He's very clearly disappointed, the wide-eyed look going out of him to be replaced by something more familiar. He's not upset, not quite, since Oikawa still said he wanted to...to go on another date, so maybe he's feeling uncertain like Yamaguchi is? Yamaguchi can't blame him; after all, his own emotions are doing all sorts of uncalled-for things to him today.]
...I see.
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The first thing he notes is his own discomfort, nothing new but important. Because he got so caught up in it that he forgot to pay attention to Yamaguchi properly. Yamaguchi who is insecure, Oikawa knows that. Of course he wouldn't take the right message from anything other than explicit words.]
I like you a lot. But you're probably too nice for me, Yama-chan. [That has his usual grain of truth in it. Going on a date with someone he likes is almost too much, if Yamaguchi ever confirmed that he likes Oikawa back - and not just when he's teasing and playing like he's a nice person - Oikawa will be hard pressed not to turn him down and claim that he was pretending the whole time.]
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Too nice? I don't get it. [Sure, he probably seems nice compared to Tsukishima, but honestly who isn't?]
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Nice people get tired of me quickly. [Or they realise one day that the glimpses of a not very nice person they get from Oikawa occasionally are who Oikawa actually is.]
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[Yamaguchi looks incredulous, like he simply can't believe that for one second. Oikawa's a cool person with a with a lot of fans and accomplishments, why does he think people will get bored of him like it's no big deal?]
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That's...totally strange to me, Oikawa-san. [He can't imagine anyone simply tiring of a person like Oikawa.] I mean, you're really cool.
[Not as cool as Tsukishima, but still very, undeniably cool.]
But...if they do, they're probably not that nice to begin with.
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It's not something you should worry about, Yama-chan. You don't mind spending time with me now and I don't plan to waste the time I have. [It's going to take more than that to convince Oikawa that nice people don't get tired of him. And when Yamaguchi does, he just has to back away and it will be like it never happened.]
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Don't make it sound like I'm just gonna get bored and stop hanging out with you!!
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Oh, and why shouldn't I? [Because that's what happens. He has one friend, Yamaguchi. There's a reason for that.]
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B-Because I wouldn't! That's all...
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[Which he feels a little bad about. But only a little.]
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[And because he tried to start off the conversation by casually propositioning him, which Yamaguchi isn't going to mention now because he's still not certain whether or not that was fully intended as a joke.]
But, it's a different situation now, though, Oikawa-san! ...Right?
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And who's to say the situation won't change again?
I'm letting you have an out, Yama-chan. The least you can do is remember I gave it to you when you change your mind.
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...I'm probably not gonna change my mind, though. [Like Oikawa, Yamaguchi hasn't got many friends. Karasuno and the team are slowly changing that, but when it comes down to it there's still a lot Yamaguchi's willing to put up with to keep the ones he has—even Tsukishima has only crossed that line once, to date.]
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He sighs, relaxes back in his chair.]
How much of this conversation do you think our waitress has listened to?
[He hasn't seen her listening in, and it would be unprofessional for her to, but if he was in her shoes he'd have listened to everything she could have.]
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[That makes Yamaguchi panic and jump back half a meter from the setter's chair—he's so used to being ignored by now, that he hadn't even considered the possibility that anyone else might be eavesdropping. He frantically glances around, searching the surrounding restaurant for judging eyes of any waitstaff, other patrons, or custodians that might be listening in. Yamaguchi's gotten better, a lot better, about ignoring the unkind opinions of others when they crop up. But the idea of being subjected to that in front of Oikawa of all people is mortifying.]
Was she really listening?? [noooo] Oikawa-san??!
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But if I saw two attractive guys out on a date I'd want to know what they were saying. [He is sometimes a nosy bastard, but does have past evidence of people listening in on his conversations with Iwaizumi, though that didn't have the "date" part.]
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may or may not have spent an hour rereading this whole thread today b/c adorables
I'm so pleased. I love these dorks and they're so cute with each other
I SWEAR I BLINKED AND THEN THIS CRACK PAIRING WAS MY NEW FAVORITE THING
I thought it was a cute little rarepair before but now I care SO MUCH
STUPIDLY CARING SO MUCH ABOUT THESE STUPID INSECURE LOSERS AND THEIR STUPID CUTENESS
the best kind of losers
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what I want to see is tsukishima's face when yamaguchi tells him he's dating oikawa
i…i may need to beg helena for this at some point. ALSO I WANT TO KNOW THE SAME FOR IWA-CHAN
iwa makes the sign of the cross and moves overseas to become a nun.
no iwa THINK OF ALL THE CHILDREN YOU'RE LEAVING BEHIND
HE IS, he's thinking of one giant child by the name of Oikawa Tooru. And him being... couple-y
be strong iwaizumi be strong for mother
no one can be that strong.
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